Sorry if this is the wrong section to post this, but I didn't find anything more appropriate. I'm asking for advice because I seriously need help. I'm self-studying mathematics (at a university level; unfortunately, I can't attend for various reasons) and in the future, I would like to become a researcher in pure mathematics. However, I'm afraid I've developed a bad habit and a bad mindset. I believe that to become a researcher, it's important for me to be able to solve as many problems as possible on my own, and to do this, I always try not to look at the problem solutions (even though I have access to them). The problem is that by doing this, I often get stuck for a long time on a significant percentage of the problems I tackle, and if I eventually give in and look at the solutions, I find myself demotivated because I would have never come up with that idea on my own. The fact that I make mistakes or fail to reach solutions within reasonable timeframes is seriously making me doubt my abilities. I wanted to ask for your input to understand first of all if this is normal, if any of you work as a mathematics researcher and have had the same problems (but still managed to secure a position in academia), and most importantly, if I shouldn't feel inadequate if, at some point, I look at the problem solutions. My biggest fear is sabotaging myself and risking not fulfilling my potential because I rely on problem solutions to move forward. Thank you for the time you'll dedicate to me.